These are thoughts from my book Spit and Polish for Husbands:
A Knight’s Duty toward Others
- A knight seeks what is good for his lady. He never speaks against her honor. He serves her with faithfulness as he strives to meet the needs he is able to fill. He honors the feminine nature, gently caring for a lady as a vessel weaker in physical strength, while understanding her inner courage and spiritual potency. He knows that without her, he has no reason to raise his sword of defense.
Your wife is a treasure. Her value cannot be measured. She is a gift, not only to you, but also to all who have the pleasure of witnessing her distinctive feminine grace. Whether she looks like a model for a fashion magazine or a weatherworn farm girl, her heart is the source of her true beauty. As a knight, you must guard such treasure with your life. Your lady has willingly given up her own potential fortunes and attached herself to you, riding with you in your saddle to whatever horizons you choose. What a fool you would be to consider her a common vessel, an object that’s easily scorned and cast aside. No, although she gladly serves as your helpmate, you are to act as her servant, seeking her good, speaking her honor, and meeting her needs.
She is the reason you draw your sword. She is your inspiration for valiant conduct. Hers is the voice that whispers, “You are strong, my good husband! You can do what is right!” She straps on your sword, fills you with sustenance, and prepares your bed when you return home from your battles, weary and in need of her gentle lap. Without her, you might be a lonely, ill-fitted wanderer, without vision, without passion, and without reason to protect those who count on your courage.
A wife is not a plaything. She is God’s feminine symbol of virtue. She gives her body to her husband, she gives her mind to making a home, and she gives her soul to God. She is far more than gold and jewels. Treat her like the unsurpassable gift she is. And always remember, although she is a gift, in that she is giving of herself, she is not a possession. She belongs to God.
Whether or not your wife lives up to these qualities is irrelevant. Even if she’s a shrieking shrew, it’s your calling to treat her as a holy vessel. May God have mercy on you if you have to live with a cold, contentious woman, but your grace, your potent leadership, and your patient endurance will combine to fashion the kind of man who, with God’s help, can soften her and melt her icy heart.
Categories: Thoughts from the Heart